Cahleb Goes to the Big City

Cahleb, that lost soul fueled by kratom, a bisexual with effeminate mannerisms, former NEET, ex-dishwasher, former resident of a Midwestern state, yet once again exiled to the Pacific coast to atone for his materialistic hubris. Let us recount the tale of his misadventures in New York. What could drive man to such extremes? His is a tale of sloth and lust. After resolving to leave behind his past of NEETdom, Cahleb moved in with a cousin across the country, and immediately entered a cycle of instant gratification and degeneracy. Dating apps, makeup, infidelity, and homosexual proclivities culminated in an ill-begotten plan to secure a financial future for himself by means of a sugar daddy.

Cahleb quickly came into contact with an interested couple in New York, who would pay him a certain sum of money each week if he moved in with them. After briefly speaking with the couple online, Cahleb jumped on a plane to meet these two men on 26 September 2019 and test the waters. However, drama with his cousin foiled his dreams of prostitution, and his parents became involved.

A distraught VC conversation ensued, in which Cahleb was given much-needed advice, though perhaps not in the most gentle of manners. Server members struggled to understand the reasoning behind his decision to become a gay prostitute, but all was elucidated by Cahleb's statement that "I think i want luxury but I dont wanna work for it at all."

Though it was a seemingly apocalyptic situation, Cahleb faced little repercussions for his actions. In fact, his parents rewarded him with cosmetics and other material goods.

Did he learn from this experience? We have yet to find out...